Hey, everyone! It’s the Dash Man and there’s only six left until Halloween! So how about another treat for all you creeps out there? That’s right, you know what friggin’ time it is, kids?!?
Today, it’s all up to you guys. I gave you all the task of leaving me with your requests for my next review. I tallied up all your votes and before you start getting all nervous, I can assure you all…Hillary Clinton was nowhere near this vote.
…You do not scare me, sir. Anyway, as the title of this article will suggest, I have a question for you all…what were you expecting me to do today? I mean, what else could I possibly say about today’s movie? I’ll definitely try my best, but…heh, what the hell? Ask the Dash Man and you shall receive!
LEEET’S DOO THE TIII-Ahh, screw it.
‘The Rocky Horror Picture Show’ was the 1975 cult musical based on the 1973 play of the same name from Jim Sharman & Richard O’Brien. This love letter to B-Horror & Sci-Fi cheese focuses on a recently-engaged couple who find themselves in the middle of horrific hijinks involving an “eccentric” scientist, his oily and musclebound creation, and his insane servants. While the movie itself was not all that successful upon release and was slammed by most critics, it has since been cherished and celebrated by filmgoers over the decades; becoming one of, if not the most successful cult film of all time. ‘Rocky Horror’ has spawned countless re-releases, fan clubs, midnight screenings, cosplay events, references from other films and TV Shows, and even two unapologetic TV abortions from FOX.
You guys asked for it, and it may not be the first time I’ve pissed off somebody. Taking away the nostalgia goggles, the legacy, and the fanbase…What do I think about ‘The Rocky Horror Picture Show’? Wow, I can already tell that you guys are shivering with antici…
BUT MAYBEEE THE R-No! I’m sorry, I promised myself not to get too excited and stay professional. To be fair that’s a little hard to do because even if you take the legacy of ‘Rocky Horror’ out of the equation…the music is still really good. With that said, we’ll also cover some of the songs in this review seeing as how it’s one of the most memorable aspects of the movie. For starters, the film opens with my personal favorite of the entire soundtrack; ‘Science Fiction/Double Feature’. Reason being, this number perfectly encapsulates the love and dedication that went into creating ‘Rocky Horror’ and practically speaks to any fan of classic camp Horror & Sci-Fi. The many references make up the lyrics. Not to mention that awesome piano, the soft-rock guitar riffs, and doo-wop inspired chorus makes this ballad one of my all-time favorites from the movie.
Of course, that doesn’t mean that I like ‘Time Warp’ any less, which is arguably considered the most memorable song from the movie, as well as one of the best dance songs ever made; next to ‘Thriller’ & The Electric Slide. It’s no wonder why people gather and dance along in theaters to this day, it’s absolutely bonkers! Bombastic, energetic, and catchy as all hell. Not to mention that tap-dance solo from the insanely cute Columbia(played by “Little” Nell Campbell)…okay, so I got a thing for dig crazy chicks.
Okay, I’m getting ahead of myself. I hardly even talked about the movie itself. Once again, there’s not that much to say, really. I mean, almost every character in the movie is memorable. Although I was never a fan of the Dr. Scott character, I thought the Criminologist was WAY too pretentious, and I felt like Meatloaf was wasted. So much so that I remember I was mad the first time I watched the movie and saw Meatloaf’s character, Eddie, get killed off. What was the point of that?
Oh…right. Anywho, that’s just a small number in comparison to everyone else in this movie. Only the rest of the cast I actually found interesting and entertaining. Funny how it’s the crazy ones who were the highlights of the whole thing. As for my personal favorite character? Well, I mentioned how I always had a thing for Columbia, Rocky(played by Peter Hinwood) was goofy and ridiculous, and Riff Raff & Magenta(played by Richard O’Brien & Patricia Quinn, respectively) were also a joy to watch. I think you guys know where I’m going with this. Who else could steal a scene like Tim Curry as Dr. Frank-N-Furter?
Probably some of the “oddest” lyrics, but what a hell of a way to introduce the always-awesome Tim Curry. Probably the only guy who can make this character work, thanks to Curry’s eccentricity and range. This is saying a lot when you think of some of Curry’s other best performances, but this is by far his best role. As the super-flamboyant and sadistic mad scientist from Transsexual, Transylvania.
Wait, a little unfair now that I think about it. I mean, what about the “normies”? I’m of course referring to Brad & Janet(played by Barry Bostwick & Susan Sarandon, respectively). Just think of them as the stereotypical clean-cut conservatives from every B-grade movie. Obviously, Bostwick had fun in this role playing all uptight and corny, but I think Sarandon got him beat. She completely lost herself in this role and it was only a sign of great things to come from Sarandon. The first time seeing this movie, I was already familiar with her body of work but had no idea how good she could sing. ‘Touch-a, Touch-a, Touch-a, Touch Me'(yeah, try saying that five time really fast) was another energetic offering from the soundtrack as it gave Sarandon’s Janet a chance to cut lose and be both playful and lustful at the same time.
…sorry, guys. I had to get a fan and some Gatorade, it just got really warm all of a sudden. Anyway, Since we’re still on the film’s soundtrack, I just want you to know that I’m aware that I’m leaving out a lot. Trust me, if I wanted to an analysis of every song, I’d be here all night. I just wanted to point out the album’s highlights and focus more on the movie. To be fair, I think that pretty much every song is a classic…but.
Whoa, whoa, just wait a second. I don’t hate any of the songs on this soundtrack, I just wasn’t too excited for one or two of them. ‘I Can Make You A Man’ & ‘Eddie’ were the two songs that I’ve always found myself skipping. Not bad songs, they just didn’t interest me all that much. Especially when you consider how many other great songs trump these two.
Finally, back to the movie! One thing I can say is that I’ve always had a fondness for the film’s overall look. It looks all cheap, and that’s the point. I’ve mentioned before in my Dash Rants about…that other thing. So I’ll try not to repeat myself too much. Basically, the film has that eerie yet cheesy feel to it, and it all looks timeless and perfect. It’s like ‘Frankenstein’ on crack!
I’ve said this before, but there’s really not much left that I can say about ‘Rocky Horror’. It’s a cult classic for a reason, even if it has its own problems. It’s a cheesy and self-aware horror comedy that pays homage to the old days of science-fiction and horror with an iconic cast that completely lost themselves in their respective roles, memorable lines, and a truly kickass soundtrack. ‘The Rocky Horror Picture Show’ was definitely a movie…no, an experience that was WAY before its time. Whether your including this gem into your Halloween marathon or actually going to a midnight screening in costume, it’s a fun time regardless.
Thanks again for the votes, guys. Granted, there wasn’t a lot I could do with ‘The Rocky Horror Picture Show’, I still had fun digging this movie up again for this review. Stay tuned, I got more, more, more, more Halloween goodness for the rest of October. Until then, Gotta Dash…AGAAAAIN! LEEET’S DO THE TIIIIME WARP AG-okay, bye!
Movie Rating: 8/10
Soundtrack Rating: 4.5/5
Written by Shane Moose
A special thanks to the three big F’s in my life(Friends, Family & Fans) for helping me get this far, pushing me to go even further and for putting up with me when I try going further than that. To hell with my limitations!
Videos & Photos:
The Rocky Horror Picture Show(1975)(owned by 20th Century Fox & Michael White Productions)
Blade(owned by New Line Cinema, Marvel Entertainment, Amen Ra Films & Imaginary Forces)
Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis(owned by Comedy Central & Funny Or Die)
Glee(owned by 20th Television, Brad Falchuk Teley-Vision, Ryan Murphy Productions & 20th Century Fox Television)
The Rocky Horror Picture Show: Let’s Do The Time Warp Again(owned by Fox 21 Television Studios, Ode Sounds & Visuals, The Jackal Group & 20th Television)
The Simpsons Movie(owned by 20th Century Fox, 20th Century Fox Animation & Gracie Films)